Wednesday, June 13, 2012

My Kind of Funny

So I have to admit that when I am trolling around on Pinterest these days, these e-cards are constantly making me laugh.  Out loud.  How can there seriously be so many funny ones that I feel are speaking directly to me?  Sometime over the past two months I have developed a very  debilitating "something" in both my feet which actually makes it very hard to walk without pain.  I'm assuming that it is tendinitis but I would have figured that it would have gone away by now.  I've even agreed that I have to go to a doctor when we are in Atlanta.  Our house has all marble floors and by the end of the day going up and down the stairs 398473 times my feet would hurt anyway, but this is on a new level.  When I showed Deaner this comic a couple days ago he might have had his most brilliant idea ever.  Why don't I dig my Crocs out of the bottom of the closet and wear them around the house and see if they help?  Genius.  I can now go down the stairs again without having to turn to the side and go one at a time.  It's a huge improvement.  And I'd like to ask, who can resist a girl wearing these on their feet?
I might even be wearing socks with them.  And pink sweatpants.  And have a frog "widget" stuck in my left shoe which Evans keeps calling a "doggy".  So I don't know what the lady above is talking about because I'm pretty sure that someone is going to tell me that I have a nice lookin' pair of Crocs!  Several other e-cards have spoken to me and here they are in no particular order:  (Please, if you have delicate eyes, stop reading now.  The language is atrocious yet completely perfect).
Skinny feels good but dessert recipes on Pinterest taste better.
Somehow this seems to happen to me once every two or three weeks.  I think it has to do with all the traveling during the week for Deaner's job.  I've also been known to have to think very hard what which month it is.  I do realize it is 2012.
Need I say more?  It probably hasn't been five WHOLE years and sometimes I think really hard about going until I actually feel badly about it.  Just not bad enough to actually go.
I don't think it is too much to ask at all.  And I love the dramatics of the comic characters.
Not that ALL my friends drink too much, swear too much or have questionable morals........just my favorite ones.  :)  If you are a friend of mine and think you don't fall into this category, don't be insulted, just try and remember all the way back to our college days and/or mid-twenties.  Did you go to Ole Miss with me?  Live on Allen Road?  I'm positive you can find something that will drop you into this category.
I feel like this a lot.  The problem is that I usually choose to go ahead and clean.  Again.  And again.  And then again.  Someone slap me.
This last one goes out to my sister and to my mother.  The real question that runs through my head every single time I'm in the check out line at Target is, "why do I NOT have a target red card"?  I mean, it's just a check card, exactly like the Visa I just swiped and I would get 5% back on EVERYTHING?  I could have been a millionaire by now.  Oh wait.....  My second thought is always something along the lines of "wait a second, where did all this stuff come from?  I only came here for 1 thing.  Did I really decide to buy that dress?  Do I really need 24 new pairs of socks?  Thank god you can now buy beer on Sundays!  Uhhh, I swear I put all ten of those item that were just scanned back.  Evans really does need that new lake float.  I'll use this for years.  My total is WHAT???  Nah, I don't want to sign up for 5% back red card".  The next time my mom and I are looking for an afternoon outing I should probably "just say no" to Target.  I lose all financial sensibility when the cold air conditioning hits my face thru the red sliding doors.  At least I have those super cute new pajama pants to throw on the floor when I get into bed at night.  Mom and Amelia, I'll be home in 8 days, please stand by.

4 comments:

Laura Bedingfield Herakovich said...

The frog jibbit takes the cake. Next thing you know, you'll have 5 cats and I'll have to de-friend you.

susanne said...

I think I may apply for my Target debit card NOW so I'll be ready when you get home. YEA!!!

Me said...

Stumbled across your blog today while surfing Next Blog. Very funny!! Thanks for the laughs!!

Me said...

Stumbled across your blog while surfing Next Blog. Very funny!! Thanks for the laughs!!