Good Feedback

I would first off like the thank everyone for all the positive feed back that I've gotten regarding Evans and his less than enthusiastic approach to preschool. I love reading from all my new commenters so I hope that y'all will keep it up. Seriously, it makes my day. And what a day it was. I spent all day with my aunt's sick infant only to be told (after I forced her to go to the doctor) that there was nothing wrong with him. I'm thrilled to hear this news but Jack.........would you like to explain to me what all the screaming going on this morning was? Did ya just decide that you hated me or something? When my aunt got home from the doctor's appointment Evans and I bolted because Evans desperately needed a nap before Buddy's birthday dinner in a fancy restaurant. Already there are so many red flags that should be going up to all mothers. (desperately needing a nap and fancy restaurant were the buzz words if you didn't catch them). Evans did sleep for about 45 minutes so Susie and I dolled him up in his fanciest longall and tossed him the car. One of the jobs that Susie was in charge of was putting on Evans shoes. She slapped those things on and tied up quickly and we were on our way. About 5 minutes into the drive I glanced over and something seemed a bit off. Way off. Like left and right shoe wrong.Umm-hmmmm, yes. These shoes are definitely on the wrong feet. No wonder this kid can't walk! I always let Susie put the shoes on and now I have no idea how many times before this has happened. Ha ha. I'm sure none but Lord we got a good laugh at it when I noticed it. Didn't seem to bother Evans.

We got to the restaurant, had a drink, chatted, feed Evans a meatball, watched Evans drive his dump truck over the meatball and then up the sleeve of Aunt Mimi. We ordered food and wine and this is really I think when things started to go downhill. As the waiter was pouring Mommy's glass of red wine Evans got a little over excited and crashed his dump truck into it, spilling wine all over the table. Blood pressure and anxiety begin a slow rise. In all fairness, I do think that he just got excited and that he didn't mean to knock it over. When I looked so shocked and turned to scold him he leaned forward and kissed me on the lips. I honestly think it scared him just as much. Mess was cleaned crisis averted. Entrees are brought out to the table and as I was about to dig into my Pasti Rigati Arrabiatta pasta the one and only dump truck whizzed past my face at the speed of light and onto the floor. This was just the beginning of the nuclear meltdown that ensued. He was obviously angry about something, who knows what but I resigned myself to eating out of a doggie bag that night. I took Evans to the car past people staring at the screaming child who will likely get a beating in the car! :) Oh my gosh, he can scream so loud. And only in situations that require immediate evacuation plans! There was no dawdling, it was cold outside and thankfully I managed to snag my coat and mom's car keys.

In the chilly car we watch a few videos of Dinosaur Train until I decided I should probably take this time out oppertunity and run over to Publix to pick Evans up some milk. As I was about to pull out my sister came running to the car and said she would come. Off to the grocery. I went in for milk and came out with FOUR bottles of wine as well. Impulse shopping? Oh well, nice wine never hurts! I should have unscrewed a bottle right then and there. We headed back to the restaurant just in time to pick up the childless diners and my doggie bag. Evans and I are going to have to come to an agreement on these temper issues. Basically the deal will ask that he stop all ridiculous behavior that his mother does not deem appropriate. Seems fair?

It was a fun night to celebrate Buddy's birthday! Evans made it up to everyone when we got home by crawling around like a maniac and kissing and hugging on whomever he stopped in front of. Mainly mama! Rage report tomorrow and stay tuned to find our Evans' favorite bed time comfort item. It's just so soft and snuggly, you will probably want to buy one for every child you know!

Expulsion?

I have to admit, Evans looked pretty darn fabulous for school this morning. His choice of longall was stunning and I must say that he has fantastic taste in children's clothing. I let him pick out his clothes completely by himself. At the very least, he looked good. Apparently he did not act quite as good as he looked at school today. We avoided any major meltdowns this morning at drop off but I did dash out the door rather quickly and I could have missed it. I chose to picture him playing happily with other children when I left and not of him crying for me. However, when a teacher carried him out to the car this afternoon at pick-up I immediately saw that his "emergency binky" was clipped to his outfit. Oh hell. I'm pretty sure I even said it out loud in the car to myself. Here was the report from the teacher (keep in mind, his actual teacher doesn't bring him to the car so it is a message relayed from the real teacher). "Evans had a tough day and he cried a lot of the time". Oh boy. What do you even say to that?

"Sorry my child was such a pain in the butt today"?
"Why was he crying, did you beat him"?
"Can you tell me the exact nature as to why he was crying"?

But my mind blanked and I happily said "see you on Friday"! I know that kids cry all the time when dropped off at school but it is semi concerning to me that my son would cry ENOUGH that his teacher couriered the message out to me in the car. I'm even more concerned that if this continues then his teachers will grow to hate Tuesdays and Fridays when that whiny Evans Deaner comes to school. Oh my gosh, I bet they don't like him already! Can children get expelled from preschool? What if they suggest nicely that he not come back to school anymore? On the exact day that I wrote the tuition check! It's a really good thing that I already sent in the money for the Tiffany necklace teacher Christmas gifts! Evans might have to send in a Tiffany necklace of his own if he keeps this up. And I'm not loaning him the money either! :)

My poor baby. This whole school thing is stressful. I mean, I am really trying to be funny about it and truthfully I haven't lost (much) sleep over it at night but I will be nervous for his Friday report. We can't have three bad days in a row. He took a three hour nap. I guess all that crying at preschool wore him out. He did look really cute this morning and he matched Buddy's tie!In other news, I spent an embarrassing amount of time today debating which Vera Bradley pattern I wanted to pick for my new weekend luggage. The pattern that I have now I have had since high school and it is getting pretty battered. VB is horrible luggage to fly with because it gets dirty fast and the way they throw your bags around in the airport, it tears easily. So I really only use mine if I'm going on a road trip. I am getting a new large duffel bag and the Miller bag which is a GREAT carry on for long flights with children. One might have thought that I was actually fretting over a serious life changing decision. I think my blood pressure was a bit elevated. Finally, I made the decision, announced it to my mom and sister and felt immediately relieved. Then I scrolled down an inch to "add to cart" only to see the words written in red "out of stock online". Are you kidding me? Most normal people would have then been able to say to themselves, "oh well, at least I liked the other one just as much". Not me. I INSTANTLY wanted the one that was sold out. Bad. Deep breaths. Think about it Gleatie. We are talking about a bag here. Let it go. Yes, the other pattern will be just fine, thank you. Until tomorrow.........

Temper Temper

I don't want to call my son out or anything but he has developed quite the temper as of late. He spent the weekend before last with his dad so I attributed much of it to not being on a regular schedule and hardly sleeping. We are past the point of blaming it on that now. The thing is, the funniest things make him angry. I mean I wouldn't want him to act like that in public but I've found myself chuckling several times in the past few weeks. As it turns out, we really don't need to own 3/4ths of the toys that we do. Evans is perfectly happy to roll a 2 liter bottle of diet coke around the house for hours. Until he encounters his arch nemesis, otherwise known as the threshold. I don't know what is wrong with him but if he can't roll whatever it is he is playing with over the threshold the first time, all hell breaks loose. He. cannot. handle. it. Rage ensues. I'd be lying to say that it is not mildly concerning. I have chosen the above picture because it illustrates how some of the thresholds are in my parent's house. You can't really tell by his face in this picture but he was ticked. Here are a couple of pictures that better show the emotions he was experiencing.It was at this point that I made the executive decision that his night had concluded. Time for bed. We are going to have to work on this little problem that has developed. So, I know I can't leave these pictures without commenting on Evans' mouth ornament. In true canine fashion, he doesn't go many places anymore without carrying something in his mouth. This just happens to be the top of a sippy cup. I don't know where he got it because he has certainly not ever used a cup like this. I wonder if he realizes that there is not actually a cup attached to the lid. Every time the lid fell out of his mouth he would stop whatever he was doing to pick it up and put it back in his mouth. Too funny.

Tomorrow is a school day! Woo-hoo!! Hopefully no physical ailments will plague us during the night. I need a well rested, well fed and well groomed child tomorrow who can come home with a better report from his teacher than "tired and cranky". The tuition check is in his backpack and I do not pay for reports like that. Let's be honest, I'd rather be lied to. :) Stay tuned for a full report.

Is this a joke?

I haven't ever claimed to be a very fashion forward kind of gal. I know I know, this comes as a surprise to most of you since I am normally so fashionably dressed. And I own Tory Burch shoes and all. When I was cruising around on Facebook yesterday and this picture was posted under a boutique that I "like", I had to do a double take. The caption reads "Is this not the cutest holiday outfit you have ever seen"?? I have so many things to say about this that I hardly know where to start. Maybe I should make a list and someone can help me understand it a little bit better.

1. What about this outfit makes it a holiday outfit? It appears to be devoid of any color at all that might lend itself to holiday cheer.

2. The bottom half of this outfit are shorts. The only holiday I might wear shorts for is none. This is because I do not wear shorts. But if I did, I would probably choose to wear them between the months of May and September. This IS Atlanta but it does get a bit chilly sometimes and I'd rather not show off the color of my legs in December.

3. I might have bought into the fad of shorts being popular in the winter IF they had been paired with something that remotely appeared to match the top. They could have made me believe without much effort that these shorts would be cute.....with another top. OR that this top would be cute......with something else on the bottom. I feel like if I stare at this outfit with my eyes slightly out of focus, for ten seconds, some sort of holographic creature will suddenly appear for me.

4. I sort of lost steam somewhere between points 2 and 3 so I'll call it quits on that subject. Give me a couple years, 15 more pounds lost and a tanning bed and I'll probably come around. For now, I don't think you will catch me wearing this anytime in the near future.

I don't have else much to report. Deaner has been in town since Friday night and he has had Evans with him so not too many funny stories to report. The Thanksgiving Day Feast went okay. By okay, I mean that when Evans' teacher brought him out to the car she reported that he was very tired and a little on the cranky side. I'd say that is not a glowing report from preschool. Oh well. You win some you lose some and now he has a week to recuperate! My brother flies into town this afternoon and we are all heading to the lake house tomorrow for Thanksgiving. Something about this year doesn't really feel like the holidays are starting but I am going to try and be more upbeat from here on out. Let's see how that works out for me!

Thanksgiving Day Feast

Tomorrow, at 8:30am, I am dropping Evans off at school. His back pack is ready, his outfit is laid out and his shoes are by the back door. Come hell or high water he will be attending his Thanksgiving Day Feast. I cannot have his attendance record move to 1 for 4. Plus, I have to send in this fruit platter, a tuition check, a check for teacher's gifts, kleenex and wipes. I just have a couple things to say about this fruit platter. Can anyone tell me when fruit became so outrageously priced? I bought already sliced cantaloupe, pineapple, watermelon and grapes. This came in the form of 3 plastic containers and one plastic bag. It was $47.58.....I almost had a heart attack. But what could I do since I had to produce a sliced fruit platter in less than 12 hours. It is a good thing that Evans does not like fresh fruit (well, he likes to chew it up, get the juice out of it and then spit out the remains) but after this, I'm not likely to buy it for him! I kept telling myself while in the store that I was paying for the convenience of having someone else cut it for me. I was actually okay with this because I didn't want to do anything less than stand at a counter and cut up fruit. When I got home and started to move it to a serving platter, it became glaringly clear that the pieces were way to big for children to eat. Last thing I want to do is choke a child with my donation to lunch. So I stood at the counter and I cut up the fruit........again. You better believe Evans' calling card is taped to the top so he gets credit. He may have a poor attendance record but his mother does not skimp on fruit.

Tonight I heard Fido bumping around in the other room as we were finishing up dinner. There isn't a ton that he can get into at my parents house so I wasn't very concerned. When I glanced into the next room here is what I saw.The giant wet spot on his shirt? I heard him laughing out loud while eating his dinner in his highchair. I thought he was laughing at the second most awful show on earth, The Wild Kratts. Instead he was filling his mouth up with apple juice from his sippy cup and letting it dribble down his chin. I don't think he was swallowing any of it. No big deal. The tupperware container he is carrying around in his mouth? This is a pretty normal occurrence since he can get into the tupperware cabinet AND he thinks he is a dog. Only he got this one out of the dishwasher. Before the dishes were washed.

My alarm clock is set for EARLY tomorrow morning. Plenty of time to get up, shower, dress, wake up my child, dress him, feed him, load all his accoutrements and checks into the car and be dropped off at school on time. Going to school is exhausting. Thank goodness next week is Thanksgiving Break!

Blurry blurry nights

Weird things happen to me. I have sort of come to expect it and I find myself laughing at myself more and more often instead of becoming highly irritated like I used to be inclined to do. So, as I was driving home last night at dusk in a driving rain storm, I really should have expected what happened to me. Last time it rained in Atlanta it was very clear that I needed new windshield wipers and I needed them immediately. In a somewhat rare fashion, I actually went and bought new ones and had my dad put them on my car. Normally it would have taken at least a few more rain storms and perhaps a fender bender to have spurred this action but I guess I’m trying to be a little more responsible these days. As I was driving along down Wieuca Road my mind started wandering to my new windshield wipers and how great they were. I was questioning in my head if I had ever actually installed (I know it should hardly be referred to as an installation) wipers on my own car before or if I had always had someone else do it for me. Since I could not remember how a wiper would actually be put on a car, I concluded that I had, in fact, never put one on myself. Oh well, who cares? Why does it matter if I don’t know how to put a wiper blade on my car? I’ll never need to know how to do that. Or maybe I will.

At the exact second that I came to grips with this lack of knowledge/skill the windshield wiper flew off my windshield. Of course it did. In fact, it seems only appropriate that this is what would happen. It just about sums up the way things have been going for me lately. Only the wiper didn’t entirely fly off my car, rather, it was dangling by a wire that caused it to scrap and screech across my windshield making a highly unpleasant sound and creating the realization that I was not going to be able to continue home until something was done about this.

Did I mention it was pouring rain? I managed to make it to my brother’s old orthodontist’s office parking lot and accepted the fact that I was not going to come out of the situation dry. I have to admit that as soon as this happened I found it pretty comical. I mean, who does this kind of stuff happen to besides me? I couldn’t make it up if I tried. The only part that slightly irritated me was that I could not figure out how to reattach the wiper and there were about 8 men watching me out of their office windows. I didn’t expect anyone to come out and help me and get wet themselves but at least don’t get out of your desk chair and gawk. To make matters worse, I cannot actually reach the wipers on my Jeep. I have to stand on the inside of the car door and hover over the windshield. And I had to keep switching sides so I could examine the wiper that was attached correctly. Sigh.

I feel pretty confident now that I could have easily installed the wiper, had I had the little cardboard piece that came inside the wiper box that showed picture by picture instructions. In the dark, in the rain, not as easy. I managed to rig it on there somehow although it is clearly not right as the wiper will not sit flush against my windshield. I was nervous the rest of the way home that this would happen again so I only “wiped” when I really really could not see anymore. Thankfully I wasn’t far from home. I’m hoping that my dad will take a look at them tonight. Or maybe I should just get on the internet myself and figure out once and for all that I DO know how to put wiper blades on a car. At the very least it will put that doubt to rest and I’ll know in the future.

Evans is still feeling out of sorts. For a child that never whines and it not clingy to me at all he sure has the ability to turn it on quickly. When I went to bed last night my back was aching from toting him around all day on my hip. We picked right back up this morning where we left off last night. I’m hoping the mystery illness and fever break soon because I want my good baby back! And this has nothing to do with him being sick but I would just like to inform Evans that socks are not free, they do not grow on trees and that I am a LITTLE annoyed that he feels the need to take them off constantly and leave them everywhere and anywhere. I found 11 socks behind his crib yesterday so there is no telling how many are no longer with us. Happy Hump Day.

*The picture above is from this past weekend. I just don't like posting without a picture. Yes, that is oreo on Evans' nose and yes, those are his real teeth.

School days, school days! Oh wait....

After Evans’ first day of school last week we were pretty disappointed to find out that Friday was a teacher workday so there was no school. We eagerly anticipated Tuesday’s arrival so that we could actually have our two full days at school. Evans had a cold all last week, which he has never had before, but it really didn’t slow down his dog like crawling and barking and I didn’t think much of it. I just had to wipe his nose a lot. Then came the cough. You know, the kind that is likely to drive you insane and everyone else around you too? Well Evans’ wasn’t that bad and was really almost non-existent during the day but he managed to get going good enough each night to throw up all over his bed. This never happened in the evening hours before I went to bed nor in the early hours in which I awake. Vomiting is apparently an art that is best saved for the hours of 3:00am-4:30am. When I am truly at my best functioning level for stripping down my child, his crib (including the really easy to wash bumper), blankets, etc. You name it, we’ve barfed on it. The whole time I was thinking “we better feel better by Tuesday so we can go to school". The barfing stopped late last week and I just knew we were on the mend. Then Evans practically slept all weekend. Definitely a treat but I knew this was a sign that he didn’t feel 100%. Yesterday he kept feeling warm to me and by the time he got up from his nap he felt downright hot. The whiny-ness was at a new level that I have never experienced before. He was feeling much better by last night and I was crossing my fingers (I mean, how serious can the school be about being fever free for 24 WHOLE HOURS?). Just in case, I packed a lunch and had his backpack ready. At 7:30 this morning I crept downstairs to wake up my precious little boy who I just knew was going to jump up and down and request to go to school (in the form of some dog barking of course). It was a no go from the second I saw him. Poor thing was flushed with the glassy eyes etc. Our new thermometer (did know those things cost $50?) informed me that he had a 101.7 temperature (in case I did not know how to read numbers, it also flashes red). Do y’all think the school would have noticed if I brought him anyways? ☺ So we are 1 for 3 on this school deal.

In the meantime, I have received the enrollment fee bill, the tuition bill, an art supply bill (wth?), and a promise for the next tuition bill come December 1st. I’ve been asked to send in a platter of sliced fruit for the Thanksgiving feast on Friday and I have been informed by the room mother that I need to send her a check for the teacher’s Christmas gift’s from the class. Oh, did I forget to mention what they were? Since Evans is in the “Butterflies” class, the kids are giving the TWO teachers each a butterfly necklace from Tiffany. That’s Tiffany, the one with the blue/green boxes. The same place where I think I only own two necklaces from myself.

ALL of this being said, I really am happy to write the checks and send in the food and pitch in for the teacher’s gifts. I might not be as thrilled with the art supply fee but what are you going to do? I’m pretty sure that Evans will love school, if we ever get the chance to go again, so it will be completely worth it. Perhaps I'll even get some exquisite art pieces out of the deal. Now we just need to concentrate on getting better by Friday. We already have our outfit picked out a little bit early. It’s our last shot, because you know, school is closed all next week for the Thanksgiving holidays!